Day Two: Knitting with the gals

This evening I returned to my local yarn shop for a knit night with the ladies. I have not been able to get to the shop since late summer due to having a class on Thursday night and teaching a class right after. It was nice being able to get back to buy a little yarn and spend time with ladies who love fiber as much as I do. In my visit, I bought some Malabrigo for my Downton Abbey Mystery Knit-a-long. I need to look to see if I have the correct size needles (which I know I do, but have to get another project off of them or place it on hold). So, my shawl or whatever it is to be will be a pale green to a dark heather green. I believe it is the color of Scottish moors, which makes me so very happy. I have decided that the Clapotis I am working on just doesn't seem to be coming out nicely in the Blossom Street yarn. The yarn is coiling on itself in the pattern. I believe that it would make a better baby blanket and is just not something I would see an adult attempting to wear. I am going to rip it out tonight and place that yarn in storage. I am just not enjoying the project, so why bother? On another note, I have plans of finally picking up the stitches on my magenta vest and then blocking it. I need to tie in ends on another project so I can wear it (a beautiful purple wrap).  I can do that on a weekend and then block it out. So many of my sweaters need a little work on them to make them nice and appealing to wear. It is amazing how that little bit of work can be put off until you just don't get around to it. I need to stop doing that and just get back to completing my sweaters. Until tomorrow....

Day One

While watching the last two episodes of Season 1 of Dracula, I was continuing to knit the Clapotis scarf. It is relaxing and enjoyable to be able to knit without too much pressure from outside sources. The downside is that I don't think the yarn is the right choice for the scarf. It is curling in on itself a bit more than the other Clapotis I have knit. The silky fibers of the yarn also seem to catch and separate, causing it to snag on the stitch holders. This indicates that the item will snag on jewelry and other everyday thing through wearing it, therefore the scarf will look ratty in a matter of a month. That is not my ideal gift. I believe that my gifting will digress into pretty scarfs that are easier worn from my favorite Target. 

On a brighter note, I will join a mystery KAL for Downton Abbey Season 4. I will need to get a DK weight yarn tomorrow evening from my LYS -- hopefully a malabrigo with silk. At this point, I really don't care what color it is, as long as I get to knit this mystery. A part of me looks forward to attending the knit night once again, while another part of me dreads it. I think I dread the yarn purchase temptation over anything. I miss the ladies at the shop, and feel a little hermit like these days. I think I just got so sheltered and housed in after attending school on my normal knit nights tha I forgot what a stress relief it is. Maybe this semester will feel healthier and a little more same. Probably not with my comps and replies from the PhD programs I applied to. I will probably be a nervous wreak. Wish me luck!

365 Challenge for 2014

Okay, I am seeing that people last year challenged themselves to post each day over the course of a year on a specific topic. I will now challenge myself to post about my knitting, weaving, and spinning in the new year. Some of my posts may be about time constraints with not being able to continue or complete a project. I may find that I will have minimal post subjects during the middle of the Spring Semester, due to class schedules and tests to be taken for the course of finishing my MA in English. There may be a simple photo of a project or tools saying that they miss me. My projects may become like Golem desiring his Precious. Who knows! As the Spring progresses, I may have good news to announce or I may just post about delving into my knitting as a source of comfort. Let’s pray for good news for the New Year! Tomorrow, I will post my projects in need of love and the new Clapotis I started knitting for a teacher friend. Hopefully, this will be a start to writing and creativity for the New Year. I have missed my fiber and want to return to the glory and peace it gave me to de-stress. At least I get to return to my knit nights on Thursdays at my LYS!

Happy New Year’s Eve!

I joined a writing Group!

Robin and I were on the phone discussing life and the odd little things friends talk about when she mentioned how she’d joined a writer’s group. I asked her what about, and she told me it was based on getting feedback for writing a novel. I stated, “I really wish I could go to that with you,” only because we both are so comfortable with each other that we can half invite ourselves to the other things we do in life. She checked at the group and I received a quick invitation to meet the next round for feedback. This meant I needed to find my novel on the lurking tower Alienware.

So, as usual with my last minute projects, I decided to search for it on the Sunday before my husband started a major work project. I needed the document edited to my satisfaction and submitted by that week’s Tuesday evening. I go to turn the massive Stormtrooper looking Alienware and Windows never opens. It restarts itself at least five times before I asked my computer network engineer, geek extraordinaire  husband to take a look. My USB keyboard wouldn’t respond, so he went in search of another keyboard in his pile of computer paraphernalia. It worked enough that he could tab up to the start-up setting that scans what is wrong. That is all I am able to explain about it since how the insides of computers work when all things are plugged in is beyond me. The Stormtrooper got stuck on the video driver, or that’s what my hubby said it did. At that moment I began feeling the ugly head of an anxiety attack pop up and say, “Raaaaor!” Not pretty.We opened the Stormtrooper up and dusted – a lot! It still got stuck. sigh

Solutions to the Stormtrooper and getting the files from my hard drive:
1. Buy a new video card — CHECK!
2. Buy a hard drive enclosure to make my current hard drive an external hard drive — CHECK!

Finding a hard drive enclosure for a 3.5″ hard drive was not easy. Only one store in our area had it, and we made the error of creating it as a family outing. Our two boys were insane acting and ran all over the store like wild animals. This did not help with my anxiety attack. We did a couple other things that added to my stress level and made me start dreading the week with the boys, but that’s another story I’ll tell later. Once we got home hubby took out the hard drive and put it in the enclosure. He hooked it up to my Alienware laptop. I clicked on my files — LOCKED! YOU DO NOT HAVE THE AUTHORIZATION FOR THESE FILES. Screaming at my computer ensued. I started sounding like a territorial harpy squirrel trying to get to her stored nuts for the winter only to find them locked away with an invisible key. So, hubby tried to unlock the files. He asked me the question, “Do you know which file the novel is in?” I went ballistic, since I wanted access to ALL my files and I knew if I told him a specific file that would be the only thing he would unlock for me. Plus, I needed to get into a file folder, or two, or ten in order to find where I mysteriously placed my novel. I never made anything easy to find in the past. Meanwhile, my anxiety level has reached max capacity and I started shaking.

Hubby finally got into my folders and unlocked them all, but decided to ask me to take a look in the exact moment I couldn’t handle anything more. He gave me a few hours to settle down and then I went to look. I found the novel and just knew I would e horrified at how bad a writer I was before I went to finish my degree. I printed it out, and it wasn’t horrible. In fact, the writing was better than some of the popular novels currently circulating. So, Sunday evening I begin editing and writing sections to add to empty parts. Monday, as my kids are playing, I begin typing in those sections. One sections becomes much longer than expected and I hesitate that I took it too far. Before sending it off, I call Robin and ask her questions about what to expect from the women in the group. I am nervous about sending my writing out. She tells me they only critique to make the writing better and do not judge on the content of the writing. I certainly hope she is right since I sent out my prologue-chapter 2 out to the group to read.

I SPUN ME SOME YARN!

So, tonight I spun my second 4oz bat of roving and plied it with my former bat. So Dragonfly and Saturn look really pretty together. Making me a slouchy hat out of it. I am so proud of how thin I began to spin tonight. It may not be lace yarn but a nice DK/Worsted works nicely for my new hat. All these tones of olive-y greens with a splash of sky blue. It may actually match a silk sweater I made this past summer. Who knew the greens would be a match? Once this hat is made, I need to spin the wonderful bats Joe gave me...Sealed With A Kiss. Reminds me of Snow White....love sealed with a kiss...or maybe I have bee watching too much of Once Upon A Time. Either way, it is pretty pinks with dark greens. It might be nice to see how it looks all spun and plied together. The fun is finding a pattern to use the spun fiber on. You need just the right amount of yardage and weight for an accessory to knit up nicely. I'll post a pic of the hat when it is done and the roving before and after it is spun...well the ones Joe gave me. Too late on the greens!

Christmas Came Early

This is a short blurb that makes me so grateful and happy for the new year. Today I received word from the Sigma Tau Delta National English Honor Society that my T.S. Eliot research paper was accepted for presentation in the national convention this year. From the numbers that had submitted this year, I was accepted and have been told it is a huge honor. I was already excited and began planning the events in which I needed to arrange my teaching schedule. Then at midnight I happened to glance at my email on my phone. And what to my wondering eyes did appear, but a message from MAMA (a Medieval conference) that my Margery Kempe research paper had been accepted in their conference. This was the moment I decided that Christmas came early. I immediately emailed my professors and department chairs a second time this evening to inform them of this conference. With the first, i was told it must be some record I hold with a fellow graduate student to have three conferences in a year. Yet, at midnight, it became four. So, not only do I teach this semester, I go to Hawaii to present on Shakespeare, then to Kentucky to present on Margery Kempe, then to New Orleans to present on T.S. Eliot. This past year's work has become a fruitful harvest for the upcoming year. And it is interesting, I get to teach English 4, Brit Lit....and all my research is Brit Lit from Medieval to Modern. Excitement is not the word for this. I wonder if travel and presenting myself to people is the theme of the year?

Graduate student break

So, I have been busy studying and getting my MAT in English. After three semesters and two summers I have reached the point of interning with a GPA of 3.909, attended 3 research conferences, awaiting word from 2 conferences, getting at least 2 research articles published, attended 2 NCTE Conventions, and am now a member of ALAN. Seems like life changes drastically in a graduate program. I have hardly had time to knit, but every Thursday I go to my local yarn shop (Rainy Day Creations) and knit with good friends. I have made a couple cowls, a vest for my mom, working on a second sock, made a Lady Eleanor, completed a clapotis, made two short sleeve sweaters for teaching, made a lace tunic, made my first lace shawl, and need to finish a third sweater. I'm about to start a top down sweater class with Hattie at the shop so I can finally make sweaters that fit my body nicely. I've joined the YMCA and exercise with friends who inspire me to get healthy. I took up spinning and weaving in the last couple years and now am a proud mama of three looms and two wheels. I will probably get a traveling wheel sometime next year when I have a teaching job or am working on a second masters degree. I need to wash a sheep and card the fleece for spinning this Christmas break. I am spinning my fiber that I have stored up over the break so I have an excuse to buy more. I want to knit pretty things with the fiber I have spun. My spinning is getting nicer and my feet are slowing down. This makes me very happy. I want to start a second pair of socks with this really dark purple yarn -- very Gothic! I also have all this yarn stashed away for lace shawls....maybe I'll get to them -- or maybe that yarn will end up in my weaving. I need to finish my current weaving project and send it to my friend. It was started for her as a promise. She will get it this winter. There is so much I want to knit and weave. One day it will all get done. This winter break is a chance to get a few things completed and a few new things started.

Update and Feeling Smart

Update:

Well, exams are now over. I know according to the points posted that I earned that I have earned an A in one of my classes. The other class I took I am suspecting that I earned an A in it, too (due to being graded nothing less than a 99 in my writings and mid-term exam and making a B+ on my term paper before revision...also think I did well on the final exam). I have completed most of my Yule and Christmas shopping, but need to send off a couple packages to family. They will get them by New Year's. I have joined a new group and am making new friends of like minds; responsible, working adults that don't whine about things without having tried to remedy the situation themselves. One offered me a trial of supplements that I have tried and am disappointed at how my body seems to react to. They cause an adverse reaction and I end up having a flair up of my chronic fatigue syndrome, which is why I began taking the darn things in the first place. I looked up the ingredients and there is nothing in them that should cause the reaction, but my body is being freakish.

We are not happy with our church either. I have a difficult time going after having talked with my minister about a few things of importance to me. I was told I am a Diest and that Gnosticism has dangers, those being that the belief that Christ and God reside inside the soul means that you start believing that you are becoming a god. Hmm...Nope, don't think I am a god or goddess. But I do believe that Christ, God and the divine force lives within my heart and my soul and that it is not an external force guiding me. If I don't feel the divine within I have a hard time believing in it and will break it down until it either no longer is valid or I find the force behind the belief and understand it. Topping it off is that I was told that the Saints and the Virgin Mary are not fundamental beliefs in the doctrine of the Episcopal Church, but the following Sunday a prayer in the Book of Common Prayer all but invoked Mary and the Saints. Contradiction? I think we are going to try the Unitarian Church here in Charlotte in hopes we have a more pleasant experience with them here.

Feeling Smart:

Last night my loving husband came up to me and said, "I am Enkidu to your Shamhet." He took me off guard and I asked him who Shamhet was since something about it just didn't sound right. He was referencing The Epic of Gilgamesh, which is very sweet of him since I am an English Literature Major at Winthrop University and just finished a class in World Literature. I thought that my brain was just not remembering effeciently since that was a reading from the very beginning of the semester. My hubby said Shamhet was the temple prostitute that tamed the wild forest man Enkidu, and then I knew why his statement to me didn't click. The translation we read never named the temple prostitute and only called her the Harlot and referenced her as being from the Temple of Ishtar. I asked him where he saw that Shamhet was referenced as the name of the Harlot and he showed me the article on Wikipeadia. I read it and then went and got my copy of The Epic of Gilgamesh, since they were translating the menaing behind the name Shamhet as being the "glorious one.". I saw that there was a sun god by the name of Shamesh in the epic and that he was referenced as the "glorious sun." So, all my studies on ancient religions began clicking and I dared to comment and suggest that there was a mistranslation by the original poster.

My instinct led me down the thoughts that a temple prostitute traditionally took on a portion of the name of the goddess/god that the temple is dedicated to. For the Harlot to have a literary force behind her characterization her actual name would have had a connection to Ishtar, not Shamesh, since she was dedicated in the Temple of Ishtar. The name Shamhet suggests a connection to the god Shamesh, not to the actual connection to the goddess Ishtar. Plus, a temple prostitute rarely would take on a masculine force in her association via her temple name. That would suggest a position that would not involve civilizing a man through the sexuality of a woman, as the Harlot civilized Enkidu with exposing her naked breasts and laying with him in the forest. Women were also not associated in Akkadian culture with the sun, but were associated with lunar cycles and dark mysteries like the goddess Ishtar is of the night and darker mysteries of women...menstration, fertility, birthing and death. I have a study in this topic since I am dedicated to Ishtar's Egyptian counterpart...the goddess Sekhmet.

A night of Politics and History

I was sitting watching the results of the Presidential election last night, as probably most of America was. At the same time I was working on a paper for class about economic liberty. It was strange to be watching history change as I was pulling writings and publications from our nation's forefathers. While I was writing about free trade and state unification issues, the news was reporting the unification of the nation's voters. While I was delving into why Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence, our President Elect was changing the face of our nation and proving it is still a "living document". While I was quoting Franklin on wealth through labor, I watched a man receive his wages from the labor he inputted over the years.

There is something about a Presidential Election that touches the soul. This one created a closure for all the Civil Rights movements and the freedom that minorities have fought for since the beginning of our nation. The nation has spoken and declared that it is truly free and equal. I may not have agreed with this candidate's policies and I didn't vote for him for various reasons (main one since I am a woman and wanted to support the political growth of a woman), but he is our President Elect and I am a patriot. He now represents me in the world and I can only provide support and hope for the best in the future.

Looking forward to this weekend

It is Wednesday and only two days away from my road trip to FL to spend a couple nights with friends. I get to celebrate Halloween with them and then the next day I get to go and do my Freemasonic duties. I am looking forward to all the joys of reuniting with Brothers in South Florida and talking about higher body subjects that I have no one to talk with about up here. I look forward to all the warm hugs I'll get to give and receive back. We get to catch up with all that has gone on in our lives and I get to eat Cuban Food! YUM!!! So, I need to wash clothes tonight after I come home from Choir practice. Then tomorrow I go to my knitting night and come home to pack for my travels. I need to make sure I spend precious time with my boys tonight and tomorrow night, so I can take little hugs and kisses along with me.

Politics

I am nervous about the state of the nation. Birds have been whispering ill omens to me of what is to come. what is happening now is similar to stories I've heard from friends' about the circumstances for years in Cuba. If a reporter is not allowed to ask questions for fear of the station being black-balled from any future political interviews then our freedom of speech will soon be held in a political vice-grip. If we, as a democratic nation, are not allowed to be aware of fundamental requirements of our political candidates stated in our Constitution, then why should that candidate be allowed to run for office. Is the skeleton that bad? Is our expectation of at least meeting the requirements to run for office no longer count as a grounds for dismissal if one of the requirements isn't met? Why should our government bail out companies that have authorized too much credit or have made products below the standard of what Americans need? The government never bailed me out of my mistakes or my debt, instead I am rewarded with a bad credit rating and higher interest rates that are variable on my student loans. Hiring at my university has been locked, so the departments who need more professors to meet educational requirements for students to get a liberal arts education are unable to hire instructors to teach me. To add to this state of affairs some professors are being layed off or have classes taken from them, which creates less opportunities for students to complete their degrees in a timely manner. How many years will it take for a student to complete all their requirements necessary for their degree now? 10 years? Also, I have found out that my professors have not received a raise in at least three years. How does that promote a person to strive to do their job to the best of their ability? What reward is that for a university to at least not give a raise based on rising inflation? In essence, the people teaching are now getting payed less now than they were 5 years ago as the cost of living has risen. Is it good for the generations of students to come to be in the position of learning less than those before them due to the debt of a nation? I truly wonder where we are headed and it makes me not only nervous but depressed.

latter Oct events and future Nov events

There are a number of things to bring up. The first is just how difficult this past weekend has been. Michael spiked a fever of 104.7 which worried me greatly since the rest of us were not getting sick. He is better now but I ended up doing a vigil until 3am that night taking his temperature until it was down. I am now tired. Part of my exhaustion is also because I had surgery, an endometrial ablation, on Oct 17th to help with issues with endometriosis and a tubal ligation to make sure we do not conceive another child (which would be a high risk pregnancy after the ablation). I am still recovering and am in need of a long nap each day after going to school. This frustrates me since I like to have energy and help out with the boys when I get home. I am missing out on time with them to do fun things. It also forces me to do my homework and reading assignments at a later time in the evening. So, my sleep schedule is now off and I can't seem to get back on track with it.

My second issue is my schedule conflictign with everything else that I see as important. Sometimes I feel torn and pulled like a rope between things and people. Joe is wonderfule and tries his hardest not to make a huge impact on my school schedule, but issues and events with my friends seem to overlap with my school, Co-Freemasonic Lodge, and time with family. For instance, we have a huge event that could possibly occur on November 22nd. That is also the chosen day for my friend's baby shower that I need to go to because I will be her son's Godmother. The baby shower also brings in my mom and her boyfriend for the weekend and the event brings in a bunch of Masonic Brothers, so our house will be jammed with people on a crucial weekends for me. I have my huge paper for my English class also due on November 25th and I had planned on using this weekend to make the finishing touches on it and stress over it. I am just a bit freaked out over the upcoming schedule. To add to it all, I have to drive to South Florida this Friday for Masonis business, which I am looking forward to since it'll be a little break, but I have to take my work with me to do whatever research I may be able to complete so I can start writing this paper. I also have another paper for my other class due on November 17th which will require multitasking in my head. Yikes!

My third issue is missing my dad. Today I carved a pumpkin and almost started crying because it was a ritual for us to create a design together and carve an extravagant pumpkin when I was in school. So, I carved an extravagant pumpkin based on Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry with the Quidditch rings in the forefront. I hope he is looking down and is proud of the work I did. I am having a Samhain gathering with friends on the November 8th to help us all mourn the passing of family members. A lot of us have lost close family this year and we are all under the stress of missing them with the holidays approaching so quickly. I am just wondering how the year went by so fast.

Back to School

I am officially a student. Yesterday, I went for Orientation at Winthrop University. It was a much better experience than when I was there before. I think the difference is that I am an English major with the English Dept advising me, instead of an Art Major with the Art Dept. advising me. It is amazing how the advisers are more helpful and willing to talk with you about your classes and how to get you to graduation. I am somewhere between a Junior and Senior according to my hours, but I have to take the lower level English classes that I ended up not taking first when I was in school before. They told me I did things backwards and that I was one of the most complicated situations they had seen. I knew they were relived when I said I was only taking 6hrs since I had little ones at home still. I could see their stress over my situation melt away and they said that I had just made it an easier situation. They actually wanted to get to know me instead of trying to push me out the door like the Art Dept. did when I was there before.

It felt wonderful to be back to school and back in the English Dept. I told them that, too, and they were glad to hear that since some students don't feel so happy about being back. I think it makes a difference how I have changed over the past 10 years and have matured. Living life with a positive attitude makes such a difference. Getting to the step of completing something I started feels wonderful. I hate leaving things in life uncompleted. I hate open ends and lack of closure. I also think I was happiest when I was studying and wish I had realized it years ago. I love writing and think that maybe becoming a teacher and a writer is where I belong. Sigh...I am so happy.

Knitting Olympics and the Cape

Well, i went and joined Ravelry's Knitting Olympics. I won two gold medals for my WIPs (work in progress). Yay! Finishing those projects has inspired me to continue knitting larger pieces, so I have started a mock turtleneck sweater and a knee-length cape. Yikes! the yarn they take costs a fortune. I can say that I am making slow and steady progress on this cape thing. I had hopes that I could wear it at the next Ren Faire...hmm...NOT! It won't take me too long to knit it, but I start classes on the 26th and most of my funds will now go towards school. Boo! I will buy one little skein of yarn at a time and read for my Literature classes most of the time.
Night!